Dilemma

Today, my parent's cornmill's warehouse head didn't come due to some reason which i don't really care about it. As a result, i need to work my ass out to cover his absent.

As information, the company according to my opinion has very little human resource. Only one or two person that are dependable, the rest are just rubbish. I don't blame them for becoming rubbish. This company lack motivation and source on enjoyment in working, let alone, good working condition. How can i change the "system" that has been working in a place for 30 over years? They wouldn't listen to me. I have try to persuade, coax or whatever things that are needed or suggested but still my voice went on wall.

Back to the topic, I worked my ass out to control 15 people who are located in two distinct location. Under the rain, under the sun, i walked, run, direct and coordinate. Since i am backed to Indonesia, i have become darker and darker. And every hard working day's night, i can't feel my feet.

I have been thinking of leaving and trying my luck in this vast world until they decided to let me handle the company wholly. But my mind keep thinking, if i am not staying, they will have to work even harder. They are my parents and i feel it's my responsibility to help them even it hurts me. But also, if i stayed, i will never improved and i even afraid that i might have been forgotten what i needed to do later when it's handed to me as i have been doing the "old system" for so long.

Thinking and thinking.... Leaving or staying... liu xia or li kai?